WHEN SOMEONE DIES.....................

All living things — including bugs and fish and people — die. It's difficult, even for grown-ups, to understand why this must happen. It may be the hardest thing of all to understand. The best we can do is accept death as a fact of life. It happens, and we can't do anything to change that.

When — and How — Does It Happen?

Most of the time people enjoy long, long lives. Lots of people live well into their 70s or 80s, and some live even longer. Slowly, though, over the course of many years, the human body wears out, just like the tires on an old bicycle or the batteries in your favorite toy. When important parts of the body — like the heart or lungs or brain — wear out and stop working, the person most likely will die. When this happens, we say this person died of "old age."

Sometimes younger people die. Sometimes a person gets very sick, and despite all the hard work of doctors and medicines, nothing can keep this person's body working. If a very sick person dies, you may hear the adults around you say that person is better off now and no longer suffering. Still, every day doctors discover more ways to prevent and treat serious illness, so the chances of a person recovering improve all the time.

Other times people die suddenly, like in an accident. This may be the hardest kind of death for families and friends to deal with because it happens so fast. There is no time for them to get used to the idea of losing someone they love. The important thing to remember about this kind of death? It's often so sudden that the person who dies feels little or no pain. We can be relieved about that.

Where Do Dead People Go?

Many people believe that when someone dies only the body dies. It is just as if a glass bottle full of water broke, and the bottle became useless. The container is gone, but what's inside — the water — remains. The part of a person that's left after the body dies is often called the "soul" or "spirit." Some people believe the soul is the part of a human that loves, feels, and creates; it's the part that make us who we are.

No one really knows what happens to a person's soul after death. There are many different beliefs about that, and it's best to talk with your family to find out what they believe happens after our bodies die. Then you can decide what you believe.

What Does Grieving Mean?

When someone we love dies, it hurts us. We feel sad that the person will no longer be around to talk to or to have fun with. That absence leaves a big hole in our lives. Maybe you had a pet that died. Remember the first few times you walked into the house after your dog or cat was gone? It was strange not to have your pet there. Maybe you cried — that's OK. We need to mourn, or grieve, over losing people and animals and other things we love.

But just like when you skin your knee, the first, intense pain will go away after a while. It takes time for your knee to heal, but it hurts less and less each day. It's the same when somebody dies. That doesn't mean we forget or stop missing people who died. After a while, we can go back to our lives, still loving them and remembering them always.

Remembering people we love who have died is one way to keep them a part of us. Pictures help us do this. Looking at a photo album can help us remember fun times we had together. Lots of families bury the bodies of loved ones in a cemetery. Then they can go and visit someone's grave. It's not that they think of the dead person as really being there, but it is a special place to go and think about how much that person meant to them.

What About Me?

When someone dies, you may start to wonder if the other people in your life will also die soon. You may ask yourself, "Will my mom or dad die?" or "Will I die?" The best thing you can do is share these thoughts with your family. It may be difficult — maybe even a little painful — to talk about these things, but it can feel good to share your feelings. It's important to talk about any fears you may have instead of hiding them or pretending you aren't scared. The people who love you want to know you're having these feelings so they can help.

Did you know you can also help the grown-ups around you when they're sad that someone has died? Can you remember a funny story about the person who died? Or something nice that person did for you? Tell the good stories you remember out loud. They will make everyone feel a little better.

If I'm Going to Die Someday, What Should I Do Now?

There are many things about death we do not know and may never know. We do know that it will happen, someday, to all of us. But you should not worry or wonder about it for very long. There are too many wonderful things to experience in the many, many years ahead.

How to Make Your Parents Love You for Who You Are

All parents have preconceived thoughts of how to raise their child and what they want their child to become as an adult. Expectations grow, and the child develops by responding to their parents upbringing. Once their child enters into the world of friends, schools and group peers, this child develops his or her own personality. Parents at times may react adversely to their child's preferences for a life style, and the child feels unloved and unhappy. This is how you can talk to your parents and let your parents know that you need their love for who you are even if that is something far different from their expectations.

Steps

1. Have a quiet discussion with your parents. Choose a time when things are quiet and calm, and nicely ask them to hear you out. Explain that you have something to tell them, and that you would like them to listen before responding.
2. 
   
   Explain that you understand that they are having a difficult time in accepting you as you as you are, but that you are still the same person they raised and love, but now have different feelings and thoughts. Make sure they know that you love them for who they are, and in turn you need them to love and accept you for who you are. Explain that you are aware of and appreciate the love they have given while raising you, and that they are good parents.
3. Remind them that not everyone has the same interests, desires, or makes the same choices. Tell them that although you learned much from them, you have become your own person with your own preferences and feelings. After you have finished, sit quietly and see how they react and what they have to say. If they are positive and accepting, then you have made your point. Hug them and emphasize how much you love and appreciate them. If, however, they say that they can not accept you for who you have become, just say you are sorry they feel that way.
4. Consider your choices, which depend on your age. You either move out of the house, or remain at home. Either way, you know that you have tried to make them understand. For now however, you just have to move on with your life. In time, perhaps you will gain their acceptance and feel their love. In the meantime, be content knowing that you have tried.
5. Don't turn your back on your parents. You cannot force them to love and accept you, but you can be loving to them.

Tips

• Do not lose your cool.
• Decide that you will not be offended by any hurtful remarks.
• Do not demand they accept you, just ask them to.
• Understand that they were brought up differently, where acceptance of differences in people were frowned upon. This is part of who they are, and you need to accept that it is difficult for them to change at this stage of their life.
• Be patient and understanding and open to them about the changes that have occurred to you, and the inward happiness you now feel. Little by little, as they learn more, they may come to accept you. Parents really never stop loving their child, and yours have really not stopped loving you!
• Be open to them and show them love. Help them as much as you can, and explain you will always be there for them.
• Maybe one day the more they understand the more accepting they will become, and will love you for who you have become.

Warnings

• Be prepared that you might not ever be accepted for who you are and understand that their nonacceptance does not mean they do not love you. Just go on with your life and be content in knowing that you tried.
• Don't ever feel that you have to change yourself to please your parents. Just be yourself, even if you're parents don't accept who you are.

Is he ready to walk down the aisle?

So you are in a relationship, you are happy and would like to make it official. You would like to settle down with him, but hey is he thinking on the same lines? Here’s how you can find out

• He loves you. Quite obvious aint it? I mean only if one is in love one would think of getting hitched. A small point to be noted here is that, many a time you might think he is in love, but it need not be so. What he feels might actually be something else. Does he spend time with you when you are in bed with a runny nose, hoarse cough and in a maniacal mood? If the answer is yes, then yes your man loves you and he isn’t there just for a good time! If he can spend time with you and pamper you when you are sick, he’s surely the long haul guy!

• His pals are hitched. Research says that if a guy moves around with married guys, he is more likely to take the plunge himself, steer away from a guy whose friends are the partying-till-sunrise kinds!

• Roti, kapda aur makaan. Nope, not suggesting a dvd rental. Just putting forth another clear as wedding bells’ chime sign. Does he own a house? Is his job secure? Does he own a car? Research shows that once a guy acquires these basics, his next move is towards the altar. Grab him!

• Is he available for you? This isn’t as simple as it sounds. Does the guy you have set your sights on have time for you? He might be a very busy man, but if he doesn’t have the time to return your calls, reply to your mushy mails, wish you goodnight, you might be barking the wrong tree! A guy who is serious about you, will find the time, no matter what to be there for you, matter over!

• Is he patient about sex? If the guy you are planning to marry wants to get to know you better before getting intimate, then he’s more likely to commit. We are not saying this, research is!

• Is it ‘we’ or ‘me’? Pay attention. When he talks about his future plans does he say ‘we’ more than ‘I’? You can rest assure you are very much part of his future plans. The ‘I’ ‘me’ ‘myself’ kinds are not marriage material.

• Your family and friends aren’t strangers to him. Only if a guy is committed to the relationship, will he make the effort of getting to know your family and friends. If marriage isn’t on his mind, he will not care about knowing you better through your people.

• You will meet his folks. A guy who hides his friends and family from you surely doesn’t have marriage on his mind. On the other hand if you are meeting up with his friends regularly, or making a weekend trip to meet his parents, you are the girl for him for the rest of his life!

• He loves kids. Now this need not be true for all men. But yes, if your love is crazy about kids and loves your nieces and nephews, he might be sending out a I-am-ready-for-our-own sign!

• He likes to spend time with you. If he says he loves spending time with you. If you two end up spending up more time with each other instead of partying. If he says he loves being with you. These are signs that he is ready for commitment. On the other hand, guys who talk about having their own space are still miles away from the wedding scene!

Itz a part of beauty...

We have about 100,000 hairs on our heads. Each hair shaft has three layers, with the cuticle, or outside layer, protecting the two inner layers.

Shiny hair is a sign of health because the layers of the cuticle lie flat and reflect light. When the scales of the cuticle lie flat they overlap tightly, so the inner layers are well protected from heat, sun, chlorine, and all the other hazards that can come from living in our environment. When hair is damaged, though, the scales may separate and hair can become dry. Because the scales on dry hair don't protect the inner two layers as well, hair can break and look dull.

The type of hair a person has - whether it's straight or curly - can also affect how shiny it is. Sebum, which is the natural oil on the hair, covers straight hair better than curly hair, which is why straight hair can appear shinier.

Depending how long a person's hair is or how fast it grows, the end of each hair shaft can be a couple of years old. So the hair at the end of the shaft could have survived a few summers of scorching sun and saltwater and winters of cold, dry air. How well you care for your hair from the time it emerges from the root plays a role in how healthy it looks.

Caring for Hair

How you take care of your hair depends on the type of hair you have, your lifestyle, and how you style your hair.

Your hair type. People with dry, curly hair have different hair care needs than people with straight, fine hair. But all hair needs to be treated gently, especially when it's wet. Wet hair can stretch, making it more vulnerable to breakage or cuticle damage. That's why using a hot blow-dryer (or other heat styling products) on very wet hair can damage it.

Some people find that their hair gets oily in their teen years. That's because the hair follicles contain sebaceous glands that make sebum, which moisturizes the hair and skin. During adolescence, the sebaceous glands may become overactive, producing more oil than needed. As with acne, oily hair is usually a temporary part of puberty.

Many teens care for oily hair by washing it once a day - or more if they're active. As long as you treat your hair gently when it's wet, frequent washing shouldn't harm it. If you have acne, it's a good idea to keep the hair around your face clean so hair oils don't clog your pores.

If you're washing your hair every day or more, it may be better to choose a mild shampoo instead of a shampoo designed for oily hair. For some people - especially people with fine, fragile, or combination hair (hair that's oily at the crown but dry on the ends) - shampoos for oily hair can be too harsh. If you have oily hair and want to use a conditioner, choose one that's made for oily hair.

If your hair is dry, it's a good idea to wash it less frequently. Some people only need to wash their hair once a week - and that's fine. Many people who have curly hair also have dry hair. Curly and dry hair types are usually more fragile than straight hair, so you'll need to be especially careful about using heat styling products. Shampoos made for dry hair and hair conditioners can help.

Your activity level and interests. Do you play sports or spend a lot of time at the beach? These kinds of things can affect your hair. For example, if you're an athlete with oily hair, you may want to wash your hair after working up a sweat during practice and games. But if you're a lifeguard or a swimmer, sun and saltwater (or the chlorine in pool water) can dry your hair out, no matter what your hair type. If you're exposed to sun, wind, or other elements, you may want to use a shampoo designed for dry hair or use a conditioner. It's also a good idea to wear a hat to protect your hair when you're outdoors.

Your hairstyle. Heat styling products like curling and straightening irons can dry out even oily hair if they're used too much. Follow the instructions carefully, and don't use them on wet hair or high settings, and give your hair a vacation from styling once in a while. Ask your hair stylist or dermatologist for advice on using heat styling products.

Chemical treatments can also harm hair if they're not used properly. If you decide you want a chemical treatment to color, straighten, or curl your hair, it's best to trust the job to professionals. Stylists who are trained in applying chemicals to hair will be able to evaluate your hair type and decide which chemicals will work best for you.

Here are some things to be aware of when getting chemical treatments:

• Relaxers. Relaxers (straighteners) work by breaking chemical bonds in curly hair. Relaxers containing lye can cause skin irritation and hair breakage. Although "no lye" relaxers may cause less irritation, both types of relaxers can cause problems if they are used in the wrong way (for example, if they're mixed incorrectly or left on the hair for too long). Scratching, brushing, or combing your hair right before a chemical relaxing treatment can increase these risks. And don't use relaxers - or any hair treatment - if your scalp is irritated.

If you decide to keep straightening your hair, you'll need to wait at least 6 weeks before your next treatment to protect your hair. Relaxers can cause hair breakage when used over a period of time, even when they're used properly. Using blow-dryers, curling or straightening irons, or color on chemically relaxed hair can also increase the risk of damage.

• Perms. Perms take straight hair and make it curly. The risks are similar to those associated with relaxers.
• Color. There are two types of color: permanent (which means the color stays in your hair until it grows out) and semi-permanent (the color washes out after a while). Some semi-permanent coloring treatments, like henna, are fairly safe and easy to use at home. Some people get a condition called contact dermatitis (an allergic reaction with a rash) from henna and other "natural" products, so be sure to test a small area first.

  Other color treatments - especially permanent treatments - can cause hair loss, burning, redness, and irritation. A few types of coloring treatments can cause allergic reactions in certain people, and in rare cases these can be very serious. So talk to your stylist if you are worried that you may be sensitive to the products. Also, talk to your stylist about doing a patch test before using a product. And never use hair dyes on your eyelashes or eyebrows.

Regular haircuts are one of the best ways to help keep hair healthy. Even if you have long hair or you're trying to grow your hair, a haircut can help protect the ends of your hair from splitting and damage. In fact, cutting may actually help your hair grow better because it's healthy and not breaking off.

Dealing With Hair Problems

Here are some common hair problems - and tips on how to deal with them.

Dandruff

Dandruff - or flakes of dead skin - can be noticeable in a person's hair and on clothing. No one really knows what causes dandruff, although recent studies seem to show that it may be caused by a type of fungus.

Dandruff isn't contagious or dangerous. Over-the-counter shampoos containing salicylic acid, zinc, tars, or selenium sulfide can reduce dandruff flakes. When shampooing, scrub your hair for at least 5 minutes, loosening the flakes with your fingers. Rinse your hair well after washing. If your dandruff doesn't improve, see your doctor. He or she may prescribe a prescription shampoo and possibly a lotion or liquid to rub into your scalp.

Hair Breakage

Hair can break when points in the hair thicken or weaken. Sometimes this happens near the scalp so a person's hair never grows very long. When hairs break at the ends, they're called "split ends," and the splits can travel up the hair shaft.

A major cause of hair breakage is improper use of chemical hair treatments, like the treatments described above. But brushing or combing hair too frequently or in the wrong way (such as using a fine-toothed comb on very thick, curly hair or teasing hair) can lead to breakage. Hair extensions and braids can also cause breakage. Leaving them in too long or pulling them out without professional help can cause hair and scalp damage or even hair loss.

Sometimes hair breakage and dry, brittle hair are signs of a medical problem, such as hypothyroidism or an eating disorder. If your hair is breaking even though you don't treat it with chemicals or other styling products, see a doctor.

Hair Loss (Alopecia)

It's normal for everyone to lose some hair. In fact, we lose about 100 hairs each day as old hairs fall out and are replaced with new ones. With hair loss, though, hair thins at a rate that can't be replaced. When hair falls out and isn't replaced by new hair, a person can become bald or have bald patches. Hair loss can be temporary or permanent, depending on the cause. If changing your hairstyle or other treatment doesn't help, see a doctor. He or she may prescribe a drug to slow or stop hair loss and to help hair grow.

As with the rest of our bodies, hair is healthiest when we eat right, exercise, and protect it from too much sun.

CHILL MAN & njoy.................

Life Is Not A Race To Be Won, But A Journey To Be Enjoyed

Life is enjoyed only when it is lived in balance. God placed you here on earth to enjoy His creation, not to live a stressed out and burdened life. Productivity on the job is not to motivate you to work more, but to work smarter and be more productive. That way, you get more done in less time and feel good about using other time to spend with family and friends.

Key Ingredients:

Every area of life must have the correct ingredients to truly be enjoyed. Your family, career, education, and spiritual life all must be in balance. Life is like the spinning of a top. As long as the top spins straight, it is free from accident. When the top is out of balance, there is a quick spin out.

You must take an account of what transpires in your life to be certain you are balanced. This doesn't mean everything gets the same amount of time. Everything must receive the right amount of time. Life does not allow for imbalance. You must make a commitment to maintain all areas of life. Proverbs tells us, "God is against an imbalanced life."

Important:

Remind yourself continually what is really important. The reason you work is so that you can enjoy relationships and life itself. Work gives you the resources to do what you enjoy. Don't lose sight of the purpose of work. Relationships are everything. Fully 85% of all personal success is directly linked to those with whom you are associated.

The keys to productivity are simple - assess what is considered a successful outcome, take action immediately, and focus until completion. The keys to success in life are also simple. Value God, yourself, people, and then work. Set those important to you as the most important use of your time.

Take Action:

• What areas of life have you neglected?

• What immediate action can you take to ensure you bring balance to your life?

• On a scale of 1 - 10 what would you rate the fulfillment you gain from your family, your work, your faith and your close relationships?

If You desire to go to the next level in life check out my coaching program!

Through this dynamic program, you will experience the results you've always wanted. With personal coaching, we look to solve the three most common problems you face as a leader:

1. Imbalance
2. Broken focus
3. Unfulfilled relationships

As a result of going through our personal transformation system, you will walk in freedom and peace in every area of your life, you will become crystal clear about what you want and how to get there, and you'll experience fulfilling and lasting relationships.

Don't miss out on an opportunity of a lifetime.